Anniversary
I have wanted you for years
My scars from you they were so fierce
So deep like valleys, deep as seas
A memory of you so strong
You were a black crow
That plucked my eyes, two shiny peas
I used to want you, dream of you
All day and night, my lover true
But nonexistent, and reluctant
Details incredible I would construe
They made the picture vivid, full
A trick of my mind unobstructed
You used to be with me, you used to touch me
In your arms you used to catch me
It was a bliss!
My life in shambles, shreds and patches
Before my eyes this very thing was hatching
Oh my, so lucky I was, to have this
Memories of times that never happened
My sense of loneliness was even sharpened
You were a thief
You stole my thoughts, my tears
My dream impossible, unclear
Now I`m glad you let it be
I can`t believe I wasted all this time
I can`t believe I have invested in a ghost unkind
It was too much for you a single word
A contract was all that you could find
You definitely crossed the line
You are so insolent, absurd
I thought you were a well
The currency i had, and which I thought it would entail,
But you turned out to be a grave
And yes, to no avail
I stood there waiting for a miracle, for help
I was brainwashed, I was enslaved
I threw in it my golden coins
Although i saw no point
Next time, I thought, next time
You would notice, you would call
Because there were some seeds that I had sown
No reply, they say it is an answer, its a sign
Years, years in a row
along with the black crows
I stood there full of hope
for resurrection, and although
I lost my treasures, lost my soul
it felt like that has become my dope
It made me see you as a well indeed
Although unkempt, I sowed the seeds
I saw the water clear
But all the time its been the weeds
I was the one who used to feed
the weeds, and called them seeds, you hear!
Where is my miracle, my wish come true?
Didn`t I invest in you?
You owe me now, I think you do
But you don`t even have a clue
Would you give me back my time, my cool?
I am so broke, I`m such a fool!
You were inviting and sincere
You graced me with your presence once, bliss sheer
You were enticing, friendly, warm
you were HERE
My heart was happy, and it cheered
I was so touched, and yet forlorn
Because for months you would be gone
And all the seeds that I had sown
They turned in to dead birds slaughtered
Which I ignored, I thought it was my vision all along
In your darkness sunshine never shone
you were so deep down drowning in the water
More blood, more bones, more death
I felt I could not take a breath
Cold, rotten hands from the grave they reached
And grabbed me round my neck, its now they have
All of me, my dreams, my soul, like meth
They were on me, a giant leech
Cold, smelly, squeezing tightly
I was frozen and could not fight it
I felt like giving up
I was so helpless, was I supposed to be such target
And all the time I had to hide it
From the very ugly start
You never knew, you were so scared
Of that I was very much aware
We were not meant to be at all
You were uninterested, rude
Dislike, disgust, you showed me what you could
It scratched and tore my soul
I did my best, I did invest
As if I wanted a grey wall to impress
Of course, it did not work at all
I realised you were a grave, the best!
Maybe all of this was just test
Are you happy that you made me crawl!
But I stand tall, away from it
I no longer want to be around it
As I used to, I was so dedicated
And I was ready to submit
My life, my treasures, although to you unfit
I`m glad to say that now you`ve faded
I saw that way too late
You took my joy, my time, it was my fate
You took my life, my days, my years
I wonder if there would be others who would do the same
They would be haunted, they would go insane
By the rotten filthy arms, and drown into your well of tears
You were the grave I spent my seven years at
You were the one who´s buried, sad
My fortunes gone, I was so wrong
It was my good faith, my veneer
My thoughts I could not steer,
Another grave carving all along
I`d rather say goodbye and choose
A life away from this graveyard, from this abuse
I`d say goodbye and hope you rest in peace
I will no longer here confuse
A well with grave, I do not want to loose
My life, its not supposed to end like this.
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