Anniversary

 

I have wanted you for years

My scars from you they were so fierce

So deep like valleys, deep as seas

A memory of you so strong

You were a black crow

That plucked my eyes, two shiny peas

I used to want you, dream of you

All day and night, my lover true

But nonexistent, and reluctant

Details incredible I would construe

They made the picture vivid, full

A trick of my mind unobstructed

You used to be with me, you used to touch me

In your arms you used to catch me

It was a bliss!

My life in shambles, shreds and patches

Before my eyes this very thing was hatching

Oh my, so lucky I was, to have this

Memories of times that never happened

My sense of loneliness was even sharpened

You were a thief 

You stole my thoughts, my tears

My dream impossible, unclear

Now I`m glad you let it be

I can`t believe I wasted all this time

I can`t believe I have invested in a ghost unkind

It was too much for you a single word

A contract was all that you could find

You definitely crossed the line

You are so insolent, absurd

I thought you were a well

The currency i had, and which I thought it would entail,

But you turned out to be a grave

And yes, to no avail 

I stood there waiting for a miracle, for help

I was brainwashed, I was enslaved

I threw in it my golden coins

Although i saw no point

Next time, I thought, next time

You would notice, you would call

Because there were some seeds that I had sown

No reply, they say it is an answer, its a sign

Years, years in a row

along with the black crows

I stood there full of hope

for resurrection, and although

I lost my treasures, lost my soul

it felt like that has become my dope

It made me see you as a well indeed

Although unkempt, I sowed the seeds

I saw the water clear 

But all the time its been the weeds

I was the one who used to feed 

the weeds, and called them seeds, you hear!

Where is my miracle, my wish come true?

Didn`t I invest in you?

You owe me now, I think you do

But you don`t even have a clue

Would you give me back my time, my cool?

I am so broke, I`m such a fool!

You were inviting and sincere

You graced me with your presence once, bliss sheer

You were enticing, friendly, warm

you were HERE

My heart was happy, and it cheered

I was so touched, and yet forlorn

Because for months you would be gone

And all the seeds that I had sown

They turned in to dead birds slaughtered

Which I ignored, I thought it was my vision all along

In your darkness sunshine never shone

you were so deep down drowning in the water

More blood, more bones, more death

I felt I could not take a breath

Cold, rotten hands from the grave they reached

And grabbed me round my neck, its now they have

All of me, my dreams, my soul, like meth

They were on me, a giant leech

Cold, smelly, squeezing tightly

I was frozen and could not fight it

I felt like giving up

I was so helpless, was I supposed to be such target

And all the time I had to hide it

From the very ugly start

You never knew, you were so scared

Of that I was very much aware

We were not meant to be at all

You were uninterested, rude

Dislike, disgust, you showed me what you could

It scratched and tore my soul

I did my best, I did invest

As if I wanted a grey wall to impress

Of course, it did not work at all

I realised you were a grave, the best!

Maybe all of this was just test

Are you happy that you made me crawl!

But I stand tall, away from it

I no longer want to be around it

As I used to, I was so dedicated

And I was ready to submit

My life, my treasures, although to you unfit

I`m glad to say that now you`ve faded

I saw that way too late

You took my joy, my time, it was my fate

You took my life, my days, my years

I wonder if there would be others who would do the same

They would be haunted, they would go insane

By the rotten filthy arms, and drown into your well of tears

You were the grave I spent my seven years at

You were the one who´s buried, sad

My fortunes gone, I was so wrong 

It was my good faith, my veneer

My thoughts I could not steer,

Another grave carving all along

I`d rather say goodbye and choose

A life away from this graveyard, from this abuse

I`d say goodbye and hope you rest in peace

I will no longer here confuse 

A well with grave, I do not want to loose

My life, its not supposed to end like this. 

Copyright ©thescribblerinthebooth

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