The Cloud
Oh, stay, my darling, stay
I am so used to having you around
With all your pins and needles on display,
That for my heart and soul are bound
You`re letting blood, you cut my wrists,
The puddle grows so deep, it sucks the gist
Of my distorted soul, it drowns.
I`m hearing the ugly sounds
It is the point, it is the purpose
the meaning of the sufferings - a crown!
I hold you on a leash to keep you near
You are my worst and darkest fear
You are my dreadful poison, dear
Reflection of my darkest side, in here
I wish that I could let you go
I wish that I could cut the cord and fall
Into a pair of caring hands, sincere
escape your suffocating presence, dear!
Yet I keep you here with me
It is through you that I can see
Everything around me, far and near
You are my filthy guiding star, my dear
A lense of golden lie, a sphere
Suppressing silent cries, of fear
My truth - I am alive, I`m here!
Unsettling those, who gave you life, my dear!
It`s fine, the sigh, my being`s frame
The sigh of disappointment and disdain
The sigh “I wish you never came
to our wonderful idyllic, tame
to our earth and to our household!”
“A commodity like you, it can`t be sold
Our misery is deep, our burden is tenfold!”
“…those over there are worth more gold!”
The sigh, that sigh, reminds me
of you dark could above
That has been all these years around me
Another body part I `ve learned to love
And now I hold their gushing wounds together
I change the bandages, my fingers feathers
The ones worth gold have gone their way
The left them in my care to this day!
Yes, the tables turned around
My value has increased, I found
Unsettled, still, they are, unsettled,
Looking to incite another battle
Like toddlers, helpless, sitting on the ground
Demanding cradle, demanding vast amounts
Of what is never to be found
And non-existent
Despite these facts, they`re still persistent!
And here I am, in charge
This is new to me, I felt enlarged
And then again you started raining
Pretending was my job, just feigning
Pretending that I wasn`t getting wet
The drops - the pins, I`ve never felt
Pretending`s what I`ve done for years
I attributed to coincidence my fevers
I have been soaking wet, unsold
A burden to my wonderful household.
My darkest cloud, I cannot let you go
I cannot do so, you`re not my foe
You are my darkest side, indeed, my sin
A source of light you are, within
I`ve started recently to feel your rain
My fevers have been somewhat tamed
Your pins and needles stuck into my skin
Removal takes eternity, it takes a skill
Now it`s possible I see
I never thought that I could ever learn to breathe.
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